"You’re going to get a boyfriend,” Grandma says. “Only unlike your sisters, you’re choosy. You’re not going to marry the first asshole who comes along who tells you he likes you, then knocks you up."
— Meg Cabot, Queen of Babble
You’re my only real friend, Let’s not ruin it. -Sally, The Art Of Getting By

This one’s a line from the movie we watched yesterday, The Art of Getting By. I don’t want to spoil the story (in case you haven’t watch it yet) so I’ll just focus on this line by Sally Howe. Looking at a boy-girl friendship.

Perhaps everyone of us has that one friend whom we can completely trust and be comfortable with. Someone we can talk to about anything, be it personal issues or just normal chit chats. Someone who accepts us, despite our many imperfections. Someone who understands us in every way possible. Someone who will stay with us, even when our actions seem like driving them away.  And someone who we can call “REAL Friend”.

We might not have lots of them, but having just one real friend is enough. They’re genuine people, and seldom do we find another one like them. I’ve read a quote before saying “True Friends are like diamonds, precious and rare” and I guess that speaks a lot about friends. Anyone can have acquaintances, colleagues, or friends, but not all can have TRUE Friends. They are that important.

But not everything in this world is permanent right? Things come up and sometimes our relationships with these special people in our lives are stained. We lose control of our emotions and this causes us to lose the important people too. There are many reasons why we lose our true friends. But I’d just focus on this one, because it’s related to the movie.

I guess we’re not new to the idea of falling in love. Thing is, when you fall for someone, anyone, you just feel it. But when it’s for a person you are close with, your true friend, best friend, close friend or whatever you call it, you do your best to avoid it. You deny the feelings because you don’t want to ruin your relationship with that person. And I can’t blame you for that. Sometimes it’s hard to have a romantic relationship with a friend because you’re risking your friendship. I’ve been in that situation and I tell you the risk is not worth it.

You might agree or disagree with me, but i stand for what I said. Romantic relationships are complicated, and the good thing about having a true friend is that when your relationship with that special someone falls, you still have good friends who would cheer you up. But that wouldn’t be the case if you have a relationship with your friend right?

And I’m not saying that Friends don’t fight each other. But unlike couples, friends eventually settle issues faster than them. I don’t think any romantic relationship can equal a genuine friendship. That’s why I won’t sacrifice friendship for petty feelings. Especially if those feelings are just temporary. You know, our emotions can be heightened by abrupt events. Just because you feel something, doesn’t necessarily mean it’s love(the romantic one).

Relationships come and go, but true friends stay. 

Don’t get me wrong though, I’m not saying that falling for a friend, or having a relationship with one is wrong. It’s not. But I’m telling you it would be hard. And when things go wrong or when they go the other way, You can’t simply put things back to how it used to be. Truth is, you can’t bring back your old relationship with that person. If you’re unlucky you would just be strangers or acquaintances. But if not, you would have a relationship that’s a lot stronger than the one before. I just wish you have the latter one. 

This article was published in Definitely Filipino: http://definitelyfilipino.com/blog/2012/05/08/just-friends/

(Source: littlemissinym)

Forgiveness is not a chore, it’s a gift.

Forgiveness is not a chore, it’s a gift.

Discrimination: Course Edition
People might not know it, but there is this ongoing discrimination in the students of certain courses in some colleges. Students belittle their fellow students from other courses just because *insert reasons here*. You may not be aware of it, but this is what I have observed in my first year in College. By all means, read on.

I am taking up Bachelor of Arts in Broadcasting in Bicol University.  And I am proud to say that it was my first choice when I passed my application form in BU. I passed my entrance exam with flying colors, and I even ranked 3rd in our course. I have blockmates who could really speak well and can write good news articles. But even if we do well in our course, people from other courses look at us as if we are a joke. They think those in our college (College of Arts and Letters) are inferior to them just because we don’t have our Math/Science as major subjects.  Pathetic idea you might say, but no, this is actually happening.

I live in a generation which mostly considers the people who study things with numbers, figures and a lot of words (does a lot of memorizing), smart. I mean, yes, they are smart indeed. But what about those who study literature, arts, reasoning and the like, what do you call them, dumb? Or do you call them something a lot milder than dumb, but still not good enough as those who are smart? I have no problem about students who take up Bachelor of Science courses. To be honest, I think they really are intelligent people. But those who take up Bachelor of Arts courses are as equally smart as they are. Intelligence should not be based on the course one is taking up.

Some people look at students with AB courses as if they are inferior to them. We may not be majoring in Math or Science, but we still study them. They are still part of our core subjects so we are not as dumb as what you think we are. And just because we are in an AB course, doesn’t mean that we had no choice. Most students actually chose AB courses because it’s what they want to study.  They, or should I say we, are passionate about it so you don’t have to label us with inappropriate things.

All of us are students so you can’t actually say that we AB students are having easier college academic lives than you are. You might have a hard time memorizing names or computing numbers, but we are also having a hard time writing things, reading and explaining it. Every student is entitled to complain once in a while, because everyone can experience having a hard time in school.

At the end of the day, whether you are in a BS or an AB course, you are all students who chose a course that you think would best fit YOU. I intentionally wrote it in all caps because I want to make it clear that other people’s courses are no longer your concern. They chose their course, you chose yours. So you don’t have to meddle with them. If you don’t like your course then you will really have a hard time studying it, but if you love it, you would learn to embrace the hardships and gain more passion in taking it up. And in my case, passion to even fight for it.

PS. I have nothing against students who take up a BS course. If that’s what you really like, then go for it. I know that there are a lot of people who do well in their Bachelor of Science courses. I did not write this to stain the good name of BS students. I just wrote it to speak for the students in AB courses who are being continuously criticized by students and even professors. I hope that this would serve as an eye-opener to people who discriminates students directly and indirectly. No course is inferior or superior. They are of equal importance that’s why they are being offered by schools.

And for the students who are taking up or who plans on taking up an AB course, never let the negative connotations hinder you from studying the course that you actually want.

This article was published in Definitely Filipino: http://definitelyfilipino.com/blog/2012/04/13/discrimination-course-edition/